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A Tribute to Mothers

mhel — Sun, 09 May 2010 09:53:13 +0000

This story was shared to me through Facebook by Rhea, a good friend and a mother just like me. It’s a work of fiction but it made me cry and made me thankful I still have my mom and she passed on some (I hope I’ll be as good as her as time goes by) of her wonderful mommy qualities to me. I love you Nanay. To all Pinay mommies and all mothers of the world, Happy Mothers’ Day to us.

———-

“Mothers are one of the best creations of God. She has amazing powers. She can multitask without complaining. She cares for everyone without any demands. Read here and marvel at the wonder called – Mother.”

By the time the Lord made mothers, he was into his Sixth day of working overtime. An Angel appeared and said, “Why are you spending so much time on this one?”

And the Lord answered and said, “Have you seen the special sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have 200 movable parts, all replaceable, run on black coffee and leftovers, have a lap that can hold three children at one time and that disappears when she stands up, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart, and have six pairs of hands.”

The Angel was astounded at the requirements for this one. “Six pairs of hands! No Way!” said the Angel.

The Lord replied, “Oh, it’s not the hands that are the problem. It’s the three pairs of eyes that mothers must have!”

“And that’s just on the standard model?” The Angel asked.

The Lord nodded in agreement. “Yes, one pair of eyes is to see through the closed door as she asks her children what they are doing even though she already knows. Another pair in the back of her head is to see what she needs to know even though no one thinks she can. And the third pair is here in the front of her head. They are for looking at an errant child and saying that she understands and loves him or her without even saying a single word.”

The Angel tried to stop the Lord. “This is too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish. ”

But I can’t!” The Lord protested, “I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can feed a family of six on a pound of rice and can get a two year old to stand in the shower.”

The Angel moved closer and touched the woman, “But you have made her so soft, Lord”.

“She is soft”, Lord agreed, “but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish.”

“Will she be able to think?” asked the Angel.

The Lord replied, “Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate.”

The Angel then noticed something and reached out and touched the woman’s cheek. “Oops, it looks like you have a leak with this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one.”

“That’s not a leak.” The Lord objected. “That’s a tear!”

“What’s the tear for?” the Angel asked.

The Lord said, “The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her loneliness, her grief, and her pride.”

The Angel was impressed. “You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything, for MOTHERS are truly amazing.”

They have strengths that amaze men. They carry children, they carry hardships, and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up for injustice. They don’t take “no” for an answer when they believe there is a better solution. They go without new shoes so their children can have them. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their loved ones get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a new marriage. They are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Mothers come in all sizes, in all colors and shapes. They’ll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The heart of a mother is what makes the world spin! Mothers do more than just give birth. They bring joy and hope. They give compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends. Mothers have a lot to say and a lot to give.

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When Moms Love Being Mothers

mhel — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 12:05:33 +0000

Being busy in the last weeks, I wasn’t even aware that the annual special day for mothers is soon approaching. I was even surprised when it was mentioned in an event I recently attended.

Since I got married some seven (7) years ago, I now have two (2) mothers. My biological mom Nanay Erly and my mother-in-law, Mommy Emy. Both of them are very important to me. Having two moms plus the fact that I became a mom myself, Mothers Day celebration has since then became truly special to me. Every year, I always put an effort in thinking of unique mothers day gift ideas for my moms. I always make sure what I buy will be useful for them or something they would really appreciate.

What is cute is this time, I’m not just a giver anymore, I also became a recipient. My son learned making personalized cards and since two years back, I’ve been consistently receiving special and tear-provoking greeting cards from him. Some of these cards were destroyed by Ondoy but I was able to salvage the others and they are now the centerpieces of our scrapbooks.

I received another personalized card from him this morning with words: “Hi! Mama, I love you very much.” I am again in-love. I love being a mom and I love my son very much. I am in-love with life because of him. Mommyhood is again all worth it.

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Marikina Scandal

mhel — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 05:59:14 +0000

Looking for Marikina scandal photos and videos? So are a lot of people it seem.

It’s disgusting and I won’t take this sitting down. I recently made a search of Marikina sites at Bing.com and was very disappointed at the related searches it recommended when it displayed the results. See this snapshot:

Bing suggested as related searches the keywords Marikina Scandal and Marikina Babae (or Marikina Women) which means these are popular search keywords related to Marikina. A year ago, I joined the SEO projects Pinay Scandal by Macuha.com and the Filipina Online Image Reshaping Campaign by FilipinaImages.com, both are intended to redirect search results online of keywords such as pinay scandal and filipina from porn and dating sites to websites by filipino bloggers who are promoting good images of Pinays, Filipinas and the Philippines.

Today, I would like to encourage and seek the support of all Marikina bloggers, Marikina website owners, and even those not from Marikina but wishes to contribute to the campaign, to join this similar project, this time for our beloved city of Marikina. Let us join together in an SEO attempt to put our articles and websites on top search results for the keyword Marikina Scandal to uplift the image of Marikenyas all over the world. Let us disappoint those looking for illegal marikina scandal photos and videos by having our websites and articles glorifying our city on top of online search, especially Bing.com.

I How to Join? I
1. Spread the word by writing your article on Marikina Scandal SEO Campaign and encouraging all Marikina bloggers to join in. Don’t forget to put the words Marikina Scandal in your title.
2. Link back and leave a comment to this article and in return, you will be part of the link exchange project.
3. All participants to the campaign must exchange links in their article on Marikina Scandal. Let us spread the link love while promoting the image of Marikenyas online.
4. Only decent and related articles/posts on this SEO campaign will be entertained and included. Spammers will automatically be deleted.

Please spread the news about this campaign. Good luck to all of us! Mabuhay ang Marikina!

Small size Marikina Scandal Campaign Widget:

Bloggers Supporting the Campaign and their Links:

JC of Marikina Valley

Mauie Flores of Mole on My Sole

Lucas of MarikinaBiz Blog Candid Standpoint

Raredog of WebsaytKo

You’re next!

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International Women’s Day Today!

mhel — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 03:20:24 +0000

Today marks another year for the global celebration of the day for Women. March 8 is the International Women’s Day or IWD and this is the day for celebrating all the achievements of women all over the world in different arenas — economic, political and social.

For me though, the most significant accomplishments and roles played by women in their lives can be seen and felt at home — by being mothers, wives, sisters, aunts, grandmothers… A woman’s love build homes, build characters, build lives.

May this day be inspirational, worthwhile, and exceptional for every proud Filipina and all the women of the world. Allow me to especially dedicate today’s celebration to the special women in my life who in their own capacity and uniqueness played their life’s roles very well. Their contribution to developing their families, friends, and the community itself, by sharing their values, their talents, their skills, and unselfish love, are worth high commendation. These are the women I met at home, in the community in the workplace, in the training industry, in the academe, in the blogosphere, in the streets and everywhere else I found myself at one point in my life.

Here are they:

I My Mother, Nanay Erly, the best in the world I My Mother-In-Law, Mommy Emy, the reason why my husband is a good person I My Mentor, Julie Borje, who molded my principles, ethics and values by being my very own model I Dr. Elena Cutiongco, the Academician who’s barr of excellence is very high and is my inspiration to always be the best I Bobong Cutiongco, truly a loving mother, an excellent trainor, and with admirable intense passion towards her advocacies I Nhet Angeles, my sister not by blood but by heart, for being the most patient and kindest Wife and Mother I Ethel Cruz, undoubtedly strong and a beautiful person inside, a very good friend I My ate, Marivic, who will undergo an operation today, she was the reason why I became educated I Joyce Dinglasan, intelligent and patient, one of the best I met in PLMar I Osay Villaflor, a true friend, one who never fail being one, very beautiful heart I Jen Aspacio, a woman of faith and who’s love for her family is unquestionable I Noemi Dado, a laudable Filipina, a woman of action and great determination I

To you beautiful and extraordinary women, this quote holds true:

“There is in every true woman’s heart, a spark of heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad daylight of prosperity, but which kindles up and beams and blazes in the dark hour of adversity.” Washington Irving

To everyone, Happy International Women’s Day!

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On Parenting: Boosting Child’s Confidence

mhel — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 17:48:25 +0000

As a parent, we should always model strength to our children so they would not feel weak and remain motivated. What always break a parent’s heart is learning that your child is being demean by other people.

The other day, while chatting nonchalantly with my only son, he innocently blurted that he’s ugly. I said this to make him feel better: “of course not, isn’t it you look after Mama so you’re not ugly cause I’m not.” He replied, “my classmate said so.”

My son developed an obvious case of skin asthma where white spots and rashes took over his entire face. The derma said the disease is similar to eczema and does look like one so it’s definitely not a pretty sight on his face. with the creams and ointments we applied, the rashes are all gone but the white spots remained and the derma said it will take months or even years before the scars or the spots fade.

At first, I thought my son is not bothered by this. He seemed unfazed by the mockery he gets from mean people but apparently, it is affecting him. His confidence is melting down as his classmates and others tease him about his spots. I feel so bad about this and I almost cried in front of him. I composed myself and said: “Don’t mind them son. Just tell them the spots will be gone in no time. It’s bad to tease other people about their weaknesses or their looks and you should not do that to others too.”

Initially, a mom’s reaction would be to ask who the classmate is and to confront that child and tell him to leave my boy alone. I did not do that because I know I have to handle the situation calmly and should respond to the problem, not react to it. I know that even if I wanted to put my son under my protective wings from people who may harm him or hurt his feelings, I can’t do that all the time. He has to learn how to protect himself and stand up for himself so that he will grow up a man, not a boy.

What about you? Any suggestion(s) on how to handle these situations with your child or your future child?

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A Journey of Experiences and Learning Towards the New Me

mhel — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 02:23:32 +0000

“The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions, and not on our circumstances.” Martha Washington

When you were born from a poor family, physically unattractive with a fat body, will you grow up with a positive outlook in life? I am Marikenya and —

While there are many who see beyond physical beauty, I still maintain my belief that our society can be judgmental to people who are not graced with such. What are my reasons for saying so? I grew up being mocked and humiliated for my imperfect physique which made my otherwise happy childhood a story with bitter parts.

I was born fat, grew up fat, and until now, as fat as I was once, or even fatter. I always say jokingly that the only time I ever experienced having a size 23 waistline was when I was in grade 2 (in elementary). In short, I never experienced having a thin or sexy waist and body in my entire life. While some say that “size does not matter,” in many occasions, I realized it does.

Classmates, friends, strangers — they all used to tease me about my weight. I was called names — taba, tabachoy, baboy, bilbil, tabaching. I cried bucket of tears in those instances. It was very painful for me to be a center of such mockery, of such ridicules, and it caused me my self-esteem. As a result, I lost what little confidence I had for myself.

Something good happened though in my freshman year in college. I met a group of young lads who were active in community outreach programs. I joined the organization and made new friends. It was the milestone in my life that I was waiting for, the whole experience made me realized a lot of things — that I am a born leader, that I can contribute to the society, and that I love helping other people. Little by little, my self-esteem was nurtured by the loving company of friends and family and by that desire to reach out to more people and be part of community building.

Life was rewarding from then on. I found what I refer to as “the perfect job.” I heeded my calling to teach and became a trainor and an academician. At this point, I’ve realized that I’m at my best when I’m in front of people coaching, guiding, and helping them find themselves, find their best abilities, and resolve their issues.

Through it all, I’ve realized there’s just some lacking pieces to my confidence. I found out it has something to do with my physical appearance. Because I came from a poor family, I was used to dressing drably (because of financial inability to stay in fashion). Now that I can already afford some dressing up and makeover, my next journey brought me to the fullfillment of a woman’s basic desire of “feeling good by looking good.”

Here were some steps I took to look and feel good –

Modesty aside, I believe that the makeover really did me well! But wait, it did not stop there…

Now, I am completely confident! With my new look — shorter hair which made me look younger, and lighter and fairer skin which gives me a radiant glow — I now look more motivating and more inspiring. “People can see through you” right? When they look at me now, my happiness inside me is so dazzling it radiates to my participants and students.

At this point, I’d like to share with you some of the memorable words I’ve received from my students, training participants, and even those I haven’t worked with but saw through my character:

“In my lower years in school, I found it hard to write and I thought of myself as a bad writer. My teacher Ms. Daroy inspired me to practice writing and believe that I can write well. She told us we need not be great in the subject but to simply learn. Now, I’m still not gifted in writing but I am pursuing the subject and writing a lot. I now love writing so much.” Rejoice, a student from my Creative Writing Class

“I wanted to talk to you because even if we never got the chance to talk, I’ve always believed that you’re someone I can level with and get good suggestions and recommendations about my situation.” From a co-worker who was a stranger to me until she approached me about her marital issues.

And lastly, these messages from Melvin, a lad who was imprisoned at a DSWD juvenile delinquent center and who was my participant in a series of values development seminars for children in conflict with the law…

Yes, I still am the old Mhel. Still fat, still ordinary looking, still far from being perfect and still teased about her size. But now, I know better. I can proclaim to the whole world that I am worthy to live, to love and be loved. That I am more than my fats and flabs, and that I am happy and this happiness will be shared to others in any little way I can. Thanks be to God.

“Happiness comes from spiritual wealth, not material wealth… Happiness comes from giving, not getting. If we try hard to bring happiness to others, we cannot stop it from coming to us also. To get joy, we must give it, and to keep joy, we must scatter it…” John Templeton

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Apology for the Long Hiatus

mhel — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 01:03:22 +0000

For a long week, I wasn’t able to post new articles in Marikenya.com and for this, I sincerely apologize.

My days were extremely busy and I would like to share with you some of the things that occupied my waking, and even, my supposedly sleeping hours. It is midterm week and since I’m teaching two major subjects in college, it was major preparation — preparing the questionnaires, administering the exam and checking the test papers.

My day job also required me to finish major assignments and one of them, I am happy to announce, would be hitting the streets of Marikina soon, but let’s hush about it for now because I don’t want to preempt the project. On a positive note, I was again invited by MMA Media Inc., organizer of the Ten Outstanding Young Employees of Marikina City (TOYEM), for a “Gabi ng Parangal” for their tenth year anniversary as one of their past awardees way back in year 2003. The night was very glamorous and I was too shy to walk on the runway when my name was called but I obliged of course.

I was also busy with my speaking engagements with the foundation, FFICI, where I serve as a resource person. We already finished our projects in Cebu and Antipolo City and this weekend, we’ll be hitting the suburbs of Roxas City. I’d be busier in the next days as I need to prepare my presentations.

On the lighter side, I spent a day in Bustos, Bulacan, with my husband’s clan reunion. It was an enjoyable day and my son loved everything except not winning the parlor games. Last Friday too, I was a proud Momma because my son played the role of our hero, Dr. Jose Rizal, in a school presentation for the Linggo ng Wika. My mother-in-law made him his Rizal costume and I bought him his Rizal hat which turned out to be a comic relief when his classmate blurted: “Marcus, you look like Michael Jackson!” My husband scolded me for making him wear that hat because he pointed out early on that the hat was more of MJ’s than Rizal’s.

I often complain about my need for more time to do everything I needed and wanted to do. This week, I wish I am my son’s newest favorite heroine, Darna, so I can accomplish everything without accumulating eyebags and pimples. I need the best acne treatment today if I wanted to look presentable for my speaking engagements in the coming days as my acnes are having a field day. Ugh!

Life is too precious to waste. I know that even if I am not sleeping decently and my stress’ decibel is of the highest level, I can proudly say that these are all worth it. For my family and for my community, I know, I am somehow, making a “bit” difference. Every bit counts ‘ayt?

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Wordless Wednesday: The Best Nanay and Lola in the Whole World

mhel — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 05:33:09 +0000

Allow me not be wordless today as I wanted to take this opportunity to spread to the whole blogosphere my gratefullness for our Nanay (filipino term for mother) who’s celebrating her birthday today.

Nay, I love you so much and I thank you for everything wornderful you have done for me, my son, Marcus, and the rest of teh family. You are the best and will remain the best Nanay and Lola in the whole world!

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A Note on ‘Her’ Leadership

mhel — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 09:07:21 +0000

Thanks to blogger pal Migs of migsmobile for posting this in his ym account today. I really liked what the East Timor President, Jose Ramos Horta, said about the leadership of our beloved former president Corazon ‘Cory’ Aquino:

There is no greater quality in a leader than being compassionate and being humble because only through compassion and humility that one can bridge the divide.

This is indeed the kind of leadership our country needs right now. God bless her soul, even in her death, she brought the Filipinos together once again.

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Memories of Mothers

mhel — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 18:38:00 +0000

The last thing I saw on television last night before I closed my eyes to sleep was Kris Aquino narrating about her Mother, former president Corazon ‘Cory’ Aquino. I wanted to watch it but I was too tired I can barely open my eyes. The first thing I saw on the TV too this morning was the replay of the coverage of yesterday’s event, the transfer of Madam Aquino to Manila Cathedral which caused grave traffic since many people went to see the president. It was like looking back at the funeral of her spouse, Senator Benigno ‘Ninoy’ Aquino, which was flocked by hundreds of thousands of supporters.

I was not a fan. That is clear to me. I have yet to see a Philippine President who can ‘wow me.’ When ‘Tita Cory’ died though, I was sad and even cried, for the loss of a good person who loves God, her family, and the country. For me, those characterisitics are already good already to admire a woman.

She was a wonderful mother and in her, I see the type of motherhood I always encounter with mother friends who, from time to time, would burst into tears in my front lamenting their woes over the irresponsible actions and decisions of their children (now in their adolescence). Tita Cory, despite her family’s wealth, experienced a lot of disappointments and challenges in the motherhood area. Her favorite child, Kris Aquino, is well known for her ‘sensational affairs’ and publicly deplorable antics. Despite all these, Tita Cory has always remained by her side showing compassion and understanding. She was indeed an epitome of a mother who’s unconditional love was overflowing for all her children and grandchildren, especially to those who needed it like her daughter, Kris, and her son, Josh.

(photo from art.com)

I have yet to understand this kind of mothering. My son is still a baby and at this time, my headaches on mothering him are simply trivials. Tita Cory actually reminds me of my mother, physically (because her facial features sort of resemble her) and parenting-wise. She has always been the hands-on type of mom with all four of us. She was a working mother (making and selling baby shoes, called ‘bonita shoes’) but not once she neglected her duty as a wife, and especially, as a nanay.

My memory bank is filled with warm memories of my childhood because of my mother’s love and sufferings. Since I was the youngest in the family, when I reached a certain age, I’m already expected to wash the dishes. Since I was still young, I usually daydream that I was a rich princess being punished for petty misconduct by washing the dishes on our lovely copper kitchen sinks. The daydreaming would usually end with crashing glasses or plates. That was the start of everyone calling me ‘clumsy’ (which pyschologically affected me and my behavior), everyone but my mother.

She was always the ‘wind beneath my wings’ and has protected me from anything that would harm me. When I first experienced a major disappointment, she was there to comfort and understand me even when she was very disappointed with me too. When my father lost her patience with me after doing an explicitly unacceptable action, she shielded me from him and from the rest of the world, all the time crying and offering me motivational words.

Mothers are indeed phenomenal. Their love are daunting, unquestionable, and to others, unreasonable. To me, mothers’ love are flawless. My mother, as I see her, is an exceptional woman, and she is my model for raising my child. I know it would be too hard for me to become like her as I need so much maturity and spiritual understanding before I can even come close. My only consolation is that I have a good woman for a model and I would forever be thankful that I experienced being raised, loved and cared for, by someone like her. A gift not everyone receives. One day, I hope my child will talk about me the way Cory Aquino’s children are talking about her now, or the way I am fondly describing my mother to all of you. At this time, I can say I am doing a rather good job as a mom as my son just told me last night “you’re the best mama in the whole world.” Now, that’s something.

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